Can you change your emotional-state almost instantly – even to something that’s right out of your comfort zone?
One of my favourite bits of learning about shifting state and taking-on abilities was with the late, great Laura Whitworth of CTI about 15 years ago.
It took place in a coach-training session, in California. We were practising bringing more “Fierceness” to your coaching, so that we can absolutely, no-holds-barred, no-kidding around, demand that our clients fulfil their potential.
We’re on our feet in the group and one woman is struggling with the idea of a helpful, person-centred coach being ‘fierce’. Almost sobbing she says:
“I can’t do fierceness. It’s just in not me at all.”
Here’s how it went down…
Laura takes one look at this woman and asks: “You got kids?”
W: “Yes, one.”
L: “How old?”
W: “He’s nearly grown-up.”
L: “Remember when he was a baby?”
L: “Remember holding him in your arms?”
W: (cradles her arms) “Yes.”
L: (becomes this twisted, menacing figure) “I’m coming to take your baby from you…”
W: “NO YOU’RE NOT!!!”
It was absolutely incredible to see that transformation.
She found her fierceness alright, in an instant, and could still find it as easily and fast as that for the rest of the course.
It’s all there. Every emotion, every experience.
We have access to every human ability and state just like that, at the speed of thought.