The Worrier – Difficult Person Type 7
Ever worked with someone who’s brilliant but constantly on edge about getting things wrong?
So today I want to talk about the Worrier.
The Worrier is quite easy to spot at work. They tend to be a bit snappy (or even aggressive), and the reason they’re a bit aggressive or snappy about things is because they’re often terrified of making mistakes.
And this is the great paradox of the Worrier at work. Because they’re so focused on not getting things wrong, they often become unreliable. They drop the ball at key times and actually make mistakes.
They take the same approach with their teams. Of all the nine types of difficult people, Worriers are the most likely to become really awful micromanagers. They’ll stand over their team making sure nothing goes wrong, and of course they don’t give their team the time and space to learn and grow and do a good job. So their team ends up making mistakes too.
❤️ Why I like the Worrier
I like the Worrier. I mean, I like all nine types of difficult people, that’s why I work with them.
Worriers are kind of easy to help, because once you show them the patterns — that the mistakes are actually being caused by their attention on not making mistakes, and that they become unreliable and drop the ball because of that — once you can show them those patterns, the door is open for you to help them.
🧭 How to help a Worrier
If you’re leading or coaching a Worrier and you want to help develop them, the most important thing you can do is help them understand that it’s okay to make mistakes.
Normalise that sense of getting something wrong, recovering from it, and learning from the experience. That whole idea of falling forward.
The more you can do that, the more you can role-model:
“Here’s a mistake I made. Here’s how I recovered from it. Here’s what I learned, and here’s what that mistake actually made possible.”
The more you role-model that for them, the less their focus stays on getting things wrong, and the more it shifts to what is actually important about what they’re trying to do.
🎯 Keep their eyes on the prize
The second thing you’ll want to do, if you’re leading or coaching a Worrier, is help them soften their focus.
Instead of keeping their eyes on the thing that might go wrong, help them keep their eyes on the prize.
You’ll know this if you’ve ever taught a child how to ride a bicycle. You say to that child, “Oh, there’s a concrete post over there, don’t hit that post.”
And the first thing they do is ride their bike straight at that post.
What you actually want to do is say, “Hey, this is a really cool place to learn how to ride a bike. Tell you what, there’s a line of trees over there — let’s head roughly over towards those trees, then stop and see whether we want to ride back again.”
Just soften and widen the focus. Move their eyes away from what might go wrong, and keep them on what’s possible.
✅ In summary
Worriers want to do well. Their drive comes from fear of failure, but with the right support they can transform that fear into focus and reliability.
For more tips and coaching on how to deal with all kinds of challenging dynamics and build great working relationships, look out for The 9 Types of Difficult People, follow me here, or get in touch if you want more coaching and support.
